Going Deeper with Our Words: Lectio Divina Bible Study-Week 4

For the month of August, we are excited to begin a 5-week sermon series titled Words Matter. Throughout this series, we will dive into the New Testament Book of James. This small book, reflecting wisdom from Proverbs and Jesus' teachings known as the Sermon on the Mount, repeatedly addresses how we as believers communicate with God, with one another, and with the world around us. Together, we’ll examine common communication hurdles and discover practical, Christ-centered wisdom for our everyday speech. Along the way, we’ll also integrate helpful communication tools inspired by Jefferson Fisher’s book, The Next Conversation: Argue Less, Talk More.

For Week 4 of our series, Words Matter, our spiritual homework was to go deeper into James 4, reading the passage using the ancient Christian practice of Lectio Divina (click button below for guide).

So, how did you do with reading James 4? In what ways did the Holy Spirit speak to you through the text?

This past week's sermon, Conflict Beneath the Surface, asked us to lean into, our Conversation Challenge which was: Get curious instead of defensive. Ask, "Help me understand what brought you to that conclusion." Replacing assumptions with curiosity, which uncovers what's really driving disagreement.

James 4 is basically a heart check. Not the kind of heart check received during an annual physical with a primary physician. This is a spiritual checkup in which God invites us to look beneath the surface of our conflicts and examine what is happening within us.

I was thinking about reality tv. If you have ever watched a reality tv show, then you know that those shows are riddled with conflict, tension, outbursts, and hurt feelings among the group of people whose lives the cameras are following. There may be some good glimmers or funny moments at times, but for the most part, the relationships can be quite messy. Watching those shows, it’s easy to point out what someone did doing wrong or the rude manner in which words are spoken. Better yet, as a viewer, we may know something that happened behind the seasons that a person on the show may not be aware of before a conflict arises.

In contrast, for the majority of people, our lives are not televised. There are no sets, cameras, and directors cutting the scenes. We are living the daily realities of life in our homes, our neighborhoods, workplaces, at the grocery store, in traffic, and online. Caring for loved ones, working two to three jobs to make ends meet, dealing with family estrangement or no contact, or addressing our own personal mental and physical health concerns. We will not be 100% privy to the lives of others, and what we think we know about people who are familiar to us, may not be (and probably is not) the full story. People put on “happy faces” all the time but are dealing with serious stuff.

Which is why before we assume someone’s intentions, become defensive, or project our hurt or inner conflict onto another person, we have to be willing to ask: What is really going on in my heart? At times, our strongest reactions are connected to wounds in us that existed long before the conversation or interaction with another person began. Inner conflict can shape how we hear words, interpret actions, and respond to people.

I like to call it a “filter” or lens by which our own experiences shape how we perceive and interpret the words and actions of others. When we do the inner work of healing with God (and when needed, in tandem with a good counselor or therapist), our heart lenses or filters become clearer, we can get unclogged from all of the gunk and yucky stuff. The seeds of the fruit of the Spirit can grow in good soil, fertile ground. We are then able to see people the way God sees them.

The invitation is not to ignore what others have said or done. We are each responsible and accountable for our actions. This is simply to examine ourselves before we make someone else responsible for what we are carrying. What hurt am I bringing into this conversation? What am I assuming? What am I afraid of? What do I need to surrender to God? Those are the things we need to lay at the feet of Jesus and invite the Holy Spirit to work in us. James reminds us that humility changes the way we approach conflict. When we pause long enough to let God search our hearts, we create room for grace, wisdom, and truth…on both sides.

Was there a situation that came up for you this week in which you made the effort to not be on the defense and instead of making assumptions, choose curiosity? Verbally and/or in written word? How did you feel? Is there anything that you would have said or done differently?

Prayer: Gracious God, help us to pause before we react, listen before we assume, and choose curiosity over defensiveness. Give us the humility to ask, “Help me understand,” and the patience to truly hear the answer. When disagreements arise, remind us that there is often more beneath the surface than we can see. Help our words create space for understanding, compassion, and connection. And when we fall short, give us the grace to reflect, learn, seek repair, seek forgiveness, and choose a better response next time. Amen.

Join us in practicing to be doers of the word!

Words Matter Lectio Divina Bible Study & Practice: Click HERE to download our Words Matter sermon series Lectio Divina weekly bible study and practice.

Words Matter Sermon Series Replays: Words matter. Catch the series on YouTube and discover the power of what you say.

Grace and Peace,

Rev. Charisse Jones

Director, Office of Communications

St. Andrew's UMC-Brandon

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